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| Is the text on the cup talking shit? |
Remember that Mountain Dew Coolata mess from a couple posts ago? Brave PTSOTL friend JM decided to test that shit out for you. Here's his report:
If merely viewing an advertisement for the new Mountain Dew Coolata drink inspires sorrow, then it must be pure chutzpah to actually buy one, put the straw to your lips like a gun barrel and take the first sip.
Let's get the obvious out of the way, I won't use hyperbole. The drink sucks. The drink sucks in a wholly mediocre way like eating room temperature Pizza Hut. Let me describe the way I imagine this drink was created and meant to be enjoyed: Take a can of Mountain Dew. Shake it up real nice. Leave it out in the sun for a couple hours. Pour over ice. Consume with or without whipped cream (the woman at Dunks asked me if I wanted some on top. I went mercifully without).
No effort went into the creation of this beverage, that much is obvious. But what's this? After the Dew raced through my kidneys on a sick wave of piss -- "What's up bro?" -- something magical happened.
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| Sexy Flanders on the mind. via my man MG |
A tiny, rad little snowboarder dude exited my pee hole, gave me a thumbs up, did a misty kick flip and splashed into my toilet.
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3 comments:
Nice hang nail bro.
You might want to get that penis situation looked at.
I've been telling myself that exact same thing for a while now.
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