Not sure how this one sneaked up on me here, but apparently there is a singing person in the world named J. Dash who makes music that lots of you people enjoy listening and dancing to for some reason. I would have spent the rest of my days remaining blissfully unaware of this fact if it weren't for a press release I just received, reminding me just how awful the average person's taste actually is. I will now share some highlights with you, my dear readers, because I hate you.
Emerging superstar and music sensation, J. Dash, has created a new dance craze with his hit single "WOP." The music video featuring J. Dash's friend and multi-platinum selling rapper Flo Rida, along with other "WOP" videos, have gained attention from over 25 million YouTube viewers worldwide, resulting in over 100,000 sales on iTunes before radio airplay began.
"In fact," the release does on to point out, "every second of every day on YouTube, someone in the world is clicking PLAY on a WOP video."
...every second of every day on YouTube, someone in the world is clicking PLAY on a WOP video
- that thing we both just read
The song takes its name, I'm told, from the phrase "With Out Prejudice" which is confusing, because I just sort of assumed he was being racist against Italians, a philosophy I wholeheartedly support. It's actually that he's just racist against linguistics, because last I checked without was only one word, but then again I don't have my own dance craze, do I? Not unless you count fainting from built up rage a dance.
Everyone is doing the "WOP" it turns out, from football players...
To basic ass white bitches under a Bob Marley poster and next to an empty tub of Cheetos...
How do I do this dance, you might be asking yourself? Fuck you, is the answer if you asked that. Here's a more literal answer once you're done thinking the first one over:
"Before introducing the "WOP" to the world, J.Dash was a piano prodigy who performed for the Jacksonville Symphony at age 5. By the time he was 8 years old, this classically trained pianist loved to play Mozart for his family and friends," now he has a famous dance trend and probably gets waaayyy more pussy than that white nerd Mozart ever dreamed of. "Throughout his teens, however, he cut his teeth playing in various blues and jazz bands. A rapper, songwriter, producer, mixer & multi-instrumentalist, this Renaissance man also holds a degree in computer science from the University of Florida. From there, J. Dash learned the importance of marketing and employing old-school tactics to create the first ever YouTube Street Team, encouraging fans to learn the dance and join the global movement." And it worked. It really, really, worked. All of which just goes to show that if you have a dream, a stupid dream, it can come true, even if that dream is to inspire people to point their arms in a certain direction and their knees in another direction while you talk about it over a beat. Music.
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2 comments:
that is catchy, get your fucking ears checked.
The only thing worse than the taste of the general public is my awful taste. I'm ok with that. Listening to cheesey vocal dubstep today via Nero, horrible screamo via Norma Jean.
Odds are this will be my new favorite song in about 5 more listens.
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