Ummm, didn't we fight like 12 wars and go through an entire industrial revolution so we didn't have to do this shit anymore? Am I missing something? Have you people not heard of Stop 'n' Shop? (Or pants? I guess?) Why don't we just go back to knitting our own clothing, sweeping our own chimneys, creaming our own ice, and jerking off manually?
OK, fine, I'll drive 50 miles so I can walk out into a field, get all sweaty and dirty and bitten by flies, mosquitoes and possibly wild animals, and endure the feckless and grating laughter of stupid children whose brains have been addled by the deadly poison contained in apple seeds, just so I can pluck something from a tree that I could've acquired in five minutes at the store. Sure thing, boss!
Hey, I just remembered another guy who went apple picking. Went by the name of Adam. Fuck you.
OK, fine, I'll drive 50 miles so I can walk out into a field, get all sweaty and dirty and bitten by flies, mosquitoes and possibly wild animals, and endure the feckless and grating laughter of stupid children whose brains have been addled by the deadly poison contained in apple seeds, just so I can pluck something from a tree that I could've acquired in five minutes at the store. Sure thing, boss!
Hey, I just remembered another guy who went apple picking. Went by the name of Adam. Fuck you.
brought to you by
12 comments:
George Washington planted apple trees all across America so you and I and the Nobel prize committee could sleep soundly in our beds at night you damned ingrate.
apple seeds are poisonous! what is that about anyway?
what IS that about?
Jesus left a little bit of poison in each apple seed so we would never forget the terrorism attacks on Moses and Noah. look it up.
broads love apple picking though so if you want to get laid you'll have to dothis.
Tough call. I'll skip the pussy I guess.
i'm not getting why this is so bad. a little nature, a little fresh air, nice drive through the country and whatnot? is there a need to get into a homosexual panic about this? mosquitos generally die off once the weather gets below 70 degrees btw.
tell that to the mosquitoes on my front porch.
really more about accepting a loss, is it not? if you're a dude and you're apple picking, you've lost. if you're a broad and you're shopping for tv's or taking it in the wrong'un you've lost. ya dig?
It's your turn to lose is pretty much how a relationship works innit?
Do I actually have to write a fucking list entry in order to be able to visit this page and not see those two droopy bare asses?
you just might.
maybe we should start taking requests, or do joke covers over here.
Post a Comment