I did not really find this child to be exceptionally cute or awesome. Ok, yeah sure she's kinda cute but I'm trying to stand in line and look bored while I pay for my toiletries. The other people in the area all ooohhhed and aaaahhed and cast accusatory glances at me for not doing the same like I was some fat whore with a barren womb (I am, but whatever). What am I supposed to say? "Oh my, she looks so cute as she's throwing the store's merchandise on the floor and gurgling up boob milk"? I don't want to reinforce this behavior. Call me when the kid can perform some real tricks, like speaking russian or talking on her cell phone too loud or writing bad jokes on the internet.

In recent years, board members have been locked in an ideological battle between a bloc of conservatives who question Darwin’s theory of evolution and believe the Founding Fathers were guided by Christian principles, and a handful of Democrats and moderate Republicans who have fought to preserve the teaching of Darwinism and the separation of church and state.

Since January, Republicans on the board have passed more than 100 amendments to the 120-page curriculum standards affecting history, sociology and economics courses from elementary to high school. The standards were proposed by a panel of teachers.

“We are adding balance,” said Dr. Don McLeroy, the leader of the conservative faction on the board, after the vote. “History has already been skewed. Academia is skewed too far to the left.”

Battles over what to put in science and history books have taken place for years in the 20 states where state boards must adopt textbooks, most notably in California and Texas. But rarely in recent history has a group of conservative board members left such a mark on a social studies curriculum.

First of all, wow. Secondly, you ever see a post-apocalyptic or dystopian movie and think "I wonder how things got to this point in this universe? Where did shit go wrong for these people in such a way that now they can't have kids anymore, or they ran out of water or they're slaves to mole men from Jupiter or whatever?" Well, if any of us are unfortunate enough to survive five minutes into the future in this rotted corn husk of a society we live in we won't really need to ask, because now we know.

...Mavis B. Knight, a Democrat from Dallas, introduced an amendment requiring that students study the reasons “the founding fathers protected religious freedom in America by barring the government from promoting or disfavoring any particular religion above all others.” It was defeated on a party-line vote. After the vote, Ms. Knight said, “The social conservatives have perverted accurate history to fulfill their own agenda.”

Cynthia Dunbar, a lawyer from Richmond who is a strict constitutionalist and thinks the nation was founded on Christian beliefs, managed to cut Thomas Jefferson from a list of figures whose writings inspired revolutions in the late 18th century and 19th century, replacing him with St. Thomas Aquinas, John Calvin and William Blackstone. (Jefferson is not well liked among conservatives on the board because he coined the term “separation between church and state.”) “The Enlightenment was not the only philosophy on which these revolutions were based,” Ms. Dunbar said.