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| Chris Isaak is a pussy |
There was a surprising explosion of flies out on my back staircase where I keep the recycling bin this week. Could be because I don't wash the trash before I put it out there like a certain female member of the household, am I right fellas? I think it has more to do with the quick change in the temperature this week; it went from summer to 50 degrees all of a sudden, and the fly eggs were awoken from their shitty slumber too early. What the fuck? What time is it? Ugh, well, I'm up now...
That's probably why they were all so over-sized and slow, and sort of buzzing around indifferently like they didn't really want to be there. Kind of like an American tourist, literally anywhere else in the world. It made them surprisingly easy to kill. I took out three or four with a well timed Saucony-assault. That sounds like most of the shows I went to in the 2kz actually.
With one swing I sort of missed, and only ended up stunning one of the flies. Poor dude fell from the sky right into a hidden little spider web tucked beneath the staircase. You've never seen anyone move so fast as this spider, who was probably a very lucky-felling little arachnid for the rest of his short ass spidery spider life. I was both disgusted and fascinated at the speed with which he wrapped up the fly with his web-shooter, then started hauling the body up into his food hole. The circle of life I thought. I'm sorry, little fly, I said, feeling guilty about sending him off to be eaten alive. That's not a good death. I was thinking about it a few minutes later inside before I went back out and did the only honorable thing and smashed the entire buggy world to shit with my giant bear paw of justice. Then I watched this new video from Lana Del Ray.
She likes hip hop and skateboarders, but she sings like a chanteuse in a noir crime novel who has a knife tucked into her garter belt. Like she will pull you in and wrap you up, then devour you whole next to the recycling bin, full of bottles she washed out first, probably, because she's a girl. Anyway, we're all going to die.
Video after the jump.
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4 comments:
I just sent a pic of her to the Portuguese teen mom from east Cambridge doing my hair/make up for sister's wedding tomorrow. INFLUENTIAL
Sharing this is probably the biggest role I've ever played in the field of female hair arts. Kind of a proud moment for me.
gonna have to rename this blog STYLE GURU 4U
I have no choice.
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