I wrote about the difficulties in finding humor in the whole, you know, hate chicken thing for Bullett, and in the process stumbled across the least funny thing I have ever read in my life -- in The New Yorker no less! Read the whole thing here.
All of those pale in comparison, however, to this piece from Andy Borowitz in The New Yorker (Come on, The New Yorker? That can’t be right…*rifles through papers*), literally the least funny thing I’ve ever read about homophobic chicken stores, or anything else for that matter up to and including this very post I’m writing.
NEW YORK (The Borowitz Report)—Customers across the nation who turned out for Chick-fil-A Appreciation Day were in for a surprise, as the chicken restaurant chose today to launch a new product, Hate Sauce.
Delighted customers mobbed the restaurants to try the zesty new sauce, with many chicken fanciers ordering their sandwiches with extra hate. “It’s so spicy it makes your mouth feel like it’s on fire—like a gay couple in hell,” said Harland Dorrinson, who sampled the sauce at a Chick-fil-A in Orlando.
It gets worse from there.
I’ve heard more people make the argument that homosexuality is a choice, and that people can be cured of it if they want to more times in the last week than I ever have in my life. Obviously that’s ridiculous. But I never thought I’d find a convincing argument against a more intractable truth, one that showed that any single writer in the world could be cured of his own natural, unstoppable, lifelong urges: aspiring to write for The New Yorker. This may have done the trick.
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7 comments:
I am so fucking sick of people talking about Chick-fil-fucking-A
The conversation's been had, we know where everyone stands
Everyone got to grandstand on their Facebook pages and show how fucking right-on they were with the gays and all of that.
"I'll defriend anyone that likes Chick-fil-A"
How inconceivably brave of you, random FB friend.
Fucking weeks in and we're still talking about a chicken shack that happens to be run by God-botherering bigots?
Let's move on. There must be more things in the world and on the internet to discuss.
Borowitz is usually funny. Or comes close on his Twitter account.
fuck him though for that 'hate sauce' p.o.s.
I dunno dude, what else do you want to talk about?
Here's the deal though: once these cretins die off and we can go about the business of treating everyone as normal citizens of the country regardless of [some bullshit magic talk], then we can move on from this issue. Until then I'm cool to keep it going.
Just venting, I guess
Thanks for giving me a place to do it
I actually came back here to talk about the CFO guy that got canned for berating a Cfa employee
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VFdPBtxzT6k
So I guess it has legs
read the attached news story and still not sure what it was I was looking at.
About 99% of ethnic restaurant owners (EROs) probably have similar or worse views queers and stuff.
ARE YOU GOING TO BAN THEM TO0 MAN
those numbers sound pretty legit
Actually make that 99% of restaurant owners.
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