"Yeah, but how are all those tattoos going to look when you're old?" some nerd without tattoos is always asking when the subject comes up. Pretty fucking bad ass it turns out. Like this newly revealed and extraordinarily well-preserved skin art from mummified bodies believed to date back to the 5th century. 

Also dating back to the 5th century? Your flowery shoulder piece. ( Siberian Times via Buzzfeed)

The remains of the immaculately dressed 'princess', aged around 25 and preserved for several millennia in the Siberian permafrost, a natural freezer, were discovered in 1993 by Novosibirsk scientist Natalia Polosmak during an archeological expedition.

Buried around her were six horses, saddled and bridled, her spiritual escorts to the next world, and a symbol of her evident status, perhaps more likely a revered folk tale narrator, a healer or a holy woman than an ice princess.

There, too, was a meal of sheep and horse meat and ornaments made from felt, wood, bronze and gold.  And a small container of cannabis, say some accounts, along with a stone plate on which were the burned seeds of coriander.

Cannabis? Turns out what your mom was always saying about people with tattoos all being druggies was legit.

'Tattoos were used as a mean of personal identification - like a passport now, if you like. The Pazyryks also believed the tattoos would be helpful in another life, making it easy for the people of the same family and culture to find each other after death,' added Dr Polosmak.

Also made it easier for kids at 5th century BC rock concerts figure out who to hook up with, she probably said later. And, well, ok I guess that's all the jokes for this blog post. What do you want? Stop looking at me. 

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