I've been writing for Bullett, a really handsome magazine and website out of New York lately. I wrote a feature the other day on how to not be an asshole when you're asking for bartender's choice at the bar. Here's my second piece. It's about how you should quit your dreams. That's kind of the subject of all my work I guess. Excerpt here, then follow the link to read the rest.
Being in a band blows. Odds are, if you’re reading this site, you can attest to that firsthand, whether it’s through your own years spent toughing it out in a van with four guys whose faces you dreamed of smashing in daily before crashing on some loser fan’s cat-shit apartment floor, or by watching someone else you care about flush their youth down the aspirational toilet on some misguided belief in their own special brand of bullshit. So now you’re in your thirties, you didn’t have the blessed fortune to die young and beautiful and famous like you’d always dreamed, but you’ve still got this one particular skill, (and most likely no others that anyone is willing to pay you to do), so what now? You give up the dream, that’s what. You sell out, and you join a cover band and start getting paid. That’s what my friend did, who’s making a decent living playing guitar in a steady-working cover band. Being someone who watched his own delusions of musical grandeur go up in smoke, or up in nose rather, hearing that there’s musical life after utter failure was kind of inspiring. I asked him what it’s like “gigging” in a cover band. Consider it a glimpse into the days to come, young indie rocker, from the ghost of band bro future. more
OH SHIT I FORGOT TO INCLUDE THIS QUESTION AND ANSWER IN THE THING, AND IT'S PROBABLY THE MOST CRUCIAL ONE. SEE BELOW:
Do dudes in cover bands still get attention from chicks?
Yes, I'd say even more than being in an indie band, not that I've ever gotten chicks from being in either. I think it's a myth that guys in bands get girls; maybe I'm less cool than I think, but being in bands has always been more of a detriment for me in that department. The cover band I play with though, they get 200+ heads on a good night, a lot of which are underage college girls, and they, being the only entertainment for the night, get far more attention than, say, the bassist on an opening four band original bill who typically plays to a crowd half that size at best.
:(
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6 comments:
I always assumed if you had a record/disc/cassette on any label you were rich and getting famous. Then you get talking with these dudes over beers after the show and it's anything but. Good article. At least your boy can still make some scratch doing what he sort of likes.
it is really not like that at all
Thanks, glad you liked it. Yeah, bands don't make shit for money, and haven't for a while. Not until you at a point where you can consistently tour to at least a thousand or so people every stop for most of the year.
Great article. I think it's clear that normal people ruin music. If normal people wanted to hear new music - instead of stuff they've already heard one million thousand fucking times already - there would be a lot more (non-normal) people able to make a living playing their own music. Kind of like how the music at most mainstream bars and clubs is shit because it's what normal girls want to hear, and guys (normal or otherwise) want to bang them and will patronise said shitty venues.
So in conclusion normal people, particularly normal girls, ruin music.
That's sexist, but it's also kind of true ;/
The phrase "mother-groom" dance gave me a shiver (of disgust not arousal).
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