Michael Bublé is a bit like cocaine and egg nog for me, a little around Christmas time, in the right dose, and everyone is moshing. Until it's over I guess, and you're depressed/farting egg juice/realize you have your mom's taste in music. But check out he did with EW. And this video where he douches on Bieber? I always suspected the Boobz was madchillbro. Nofuxgiven.
Our new blog bro Bronan the Barbarian, on the other hand, is a Christmas music grinch, and he's had it up to his bro-tits with this Michael Bublé business. He explains why below.
Pop Song Review: Michael Bublé’s “Santa Claus Is Coming To Town”
Is anybody else as shit sick of Christmas music as I am? It’s impossible to walk into any store without running the gauntlet of holiday horseshit blasting through every speaker in the place. I’m actually surprised we haven’t had mass shootings in every outlet mall in America. If I had to listen to Jingle Bells all day, I’d be killing motherfuckers left and right. Adding to the problem, we have Michael Bublé contributing an entire fucking album of rehashed xmas bullshit, like this video above.
You must ask yourself the question, “Do we really need another Christmas album?” Seriously, this shit has been done to fucking death. I think the Recording Industry Association of America leadership held a clandestine meeting in an underground chamber where they all dressed in dark hoods and skull masks. After burning candles made of Adele’s liposuctioned fat and sacrificing a few infants over an altar shaped like Gavin Degraw’s vagina, they decided that absolutely nobody is allowed to write an original Christmas song again, ever.
Oh yeah, forgot I was supposed to be reviewing the song. Whatever. Christmas music sucks regardless of who’s singing it. Here’s some fucking amazing space metal to listen to instead.
--BRONAN THE BARBARIAN
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7 comments:
Michael Buble is the embodiment of everything mediocre and white in the world. His very existence is an affront to good taste.
That's hard to disagree with. And yet here I am thinking I do.
UGH. My bf is always jerking off over this guy. And he produced this Christmas song, which you will enjoy by the transitive property or whatever: http://theshutehenns.bandcamp.com/track/christmas-dont-be-late
Can't believe you tricked me into listening to that.
Can't believe you Courtney Stodden.
touche
That's one of the weird(est) things about Boston bros. They're all hot for gay Canadian ass.
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