Our fascination with robot apocalypse stories like Terminator and The Matrix are simply contemporary expressions of an ingrained fear that stretches all the way back to the first time your great grandfather cursed a Ford Model T as an instrument of the devil made for fornicating and horse play, and his father got mangled to death inside a windowless, sweatshop factory -- mankind has always been fearful of machines. Why? Because they're stronger than us. And they need people blood to grease their gears.
The only meaningful question in contemporary times has been whether or not the machines are going to rise up and enslave us before the zombies arrive. I think we finally have our answer, with this, the opening salvo from what's certain to be a forthcoming full scale assault. "In a bizarre episode that you have to see to believe, the winning coach and several others were plowed into by a runaway, unmanned electrical cart during an interview near the 50-yard line following a victory in a state title game Saturday at Cowboys Stadium in Arlington, Texas," says this news report from Rivals High.
May god, who I apologize for making fun of in that last post, help us all.
And that's not even the only reported attack this week. Check out this construction equipment incident via i09.
"This documents an unplanned experiment in engineering and human nature. Workers at a construction site contemplate how to arrest a machine that will not stop spinning. Then more workers join in the contemplation…"
That's just it, how can you stop something that won't stop spinning, or a cart that won't stop driving? You can't. We're all doomed.
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9 comments:
how does that one guy just paw at the steering wheel and give up? fucking mike mcqueary of runaway cart disasters right there.
bwahah. 'Well, this isn't technically my problem, I'm rolling out."
Also, uggghghghh, these two recent tragedies, neither of which I included above on account of being literally horrifying and not funny in anyway:
Elevator Accident Kills Woman in Midtown Building
http://www.nytimes.com/2011/12/15/nyregion/elevator-accident-kills-a-woman-in-a-madison-avenue-building.html
Worker dies in accident at Mass. hummus plant
http://www.boston.com/news/local/massachusetts/articles/2011/12/16/police_man_dies_at_taunton_hummus_plant/
The fart at 1:33 #FTW
Oh man, thought I heard that. Kind of a metaphor for the type of disgusting fleshly humanity these new robot slave masters are so rightfully disdainful of.
Emilio Estevez is primeed for a comeback.
Ha? What was he in again?
young guns III, rise of the machine
Wooof. Oh man I would watch that picture with glee.
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