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One of the best parts about running a hugely, moderately, popular blog my four friends like is when they send me reports from their fact-finding missions out in the world of stupid. Like this email I just got from my friend who also works for a popular lady-buying website machine thing.
Since I only have a metaphorical vagina, it took me a little while to figure out just wtf I was looking at here. "I don't get it," I asked my friend. "What does it even do?"
"Reduces period pain," she said. Wait, that's an actual thing? I thought it was just a hacky standup comedy bit.
LadyCares.com explains the amazing new device. "mn8 is a small, powerful, drug free magnetic device, which attaches discreetly to your underwear."
"I like that they show a photo of where it goes when you wear a bathing suit and then it says 'Do not wear when swimming,'" my friend said. "Because it’s electronic."
That sounds potentially problematic. "Is this like some Star Trek vagina science? Why is it pink by the way?"
"It’s pink because girls like pink and because we are pink and all ladyparts/things/anything to do with girls should be pink. Girls also don’t know/like/understand anything about Star Trek so you’re barking up the wrong gender with that question."
I like how they have an arrow pointing out the general vicinity of where a vagina is. The arrow is also pink. So does she think anyone in the world is going to buy this?
"Sure do!"
The site explains a little more:
All of that from attaching a magnet to your snatch. What will science think of next?We also believe that wearing mn8 may also boost your body naturally, giving you softer skin, shiny hair and stronger nails. Other benefits may include, a reduction in water retention or bloating, less facial spots and breast tenderness. Even a reduction in PMS or “mood swings”.
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7 comments:
I still don't get it.
How it works? Me neither. Why it's stupid? That I get.
I think.
wait til they roll out the opposite poled magnet for dood poles thereby creating the sweetest bang ever!
SHUT UP!!
fucking boys... you guys are all so stupid.
now where do i fucking buy this?
-a girl
The vagina store?
Pink isn't real life camouflage. Show me an mn8 that looks like bad deli roast beef with hairy moles. It'd be a perfect match for the old lady's beat ass cooze. I'd give my left nut to see fresh pink pussy. Preferably one that doesn't drool and wheeze like a god damned bulldog with halitosis. The wife's twat was acceptable years back. Now, not so much.
Yikes dude.
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