Friday, March 11, 2011

Would you jump off the Golden Gate Bridge if your friends told you to?


Remember when moms used to ask their kids stuff like that? Did that whole trend die off with these new soft parents we've got out there now? Helicopter  pussies I think they're called? Apparently one kid never learned this valuable lesson from his own mom, reports the Guardian in a story where they might have considered the alternative subhed: Teenagers: Still Dumb

"A California high school student who jumped off the Golden Gate bridge on a field trip, possibly on a dare by fellow classmates, has survived the 220ft (67m) plunge into San Francisco Bay that kills dozens of people each year," they write. "Most jumpers die from major internal injuries, broken bones and skull fractures, some die from internal bleeding, while others drown."

Not this 17 year old, who suffered a few minor injuries, and an estimated 123 high fives. He was pulled from the water by a surfer who paddled him back to shore, in what is probably the first known example of a surfer ever doing anything worthwhile in the history of both surfing and doing things.

"Someone leaps off the bridge an average of once every two weeks – last year, 32 people died. About 98% of those plunges prove fatal and authorities rule most of the deaths to be suicides." All of which is very sad, because, if we can be serious here for a minute, when someone gets to point of contemplating suicide, it's emblematic of serious mental issues, and nothing to laugh about.

That said, call me a traditionalist, but if I'm going to kill myself, I think I'd prefer to do it the old fashioned way: waiting it out, suffering through one cruel indignity at a time, over and over again, until the arbitrary wheel of fate pulls my indifferent husk of flesh into the endless void. I'm just a throwback that way I guess.

If we can be serious here for a minute again, for reallsy this time, if you're actually considering suicide, don't do it. Here are some sites that you can contact:
Suicide Awareness Voices of Education
National Suicide Prevention Lifeline
PornHub






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5 comments:

Anonymous said...

It depends, did someone dare me to do it?

said...

I used to jump off bridges when I was a kid. It was like two stories high though. So am I a bad ass? Yes and no.

Anonymous said...

Watch the documentary "The Bridge" and this story will mean much more.

said...

That sounds like a lot of work. Can you sum it up?

said...

this kid has taught us both that teenagers are still dumb and that teenagers are still bad ass! i thought they all turned into pussies once texting took over the world.

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