We've been trying for a long time to come up with a way to make this concept funny without success. I guess it's a lot like every other post on here in that respect. But much like sneezing, puking and deucing your pants simultaneously, it's kind of hard for the human brain to handle both face numbing rage and humor at the same time. For real. Just look at these dudes who walk around angry all day. Ever see a funny Republican for example? Didn't think so.
Get a load of this steaming mess up here on the left. I'm not only embarrassed as a "journalist," but as a person who can read. We're looking at the lazy hack trifecta:
Illogical, truncated alliteration: "Jets plan Plax play."
Pointless rhyming that adds nothing to our understanding of the story: "Yanks weep as Sox sweep." The Yanks did not weep. We all know ths.
And the kicker, a serious story reduced to a goofy but recognizable cliche that...what? How does this help anyone understand anything? "Hog Wild"? That's what you did. You came into work and decided on that. And presumably a series of other editors agreed on this? For your giant newspaper in a huge city? You deserve to go out of business. Everyone does. We're shutting the whole thing down. Not just newspapers. Everything.
Get a load of this steaming mess up here on the left. I'm not only embarrassed as a "journalist," but as a person who can read. We're looking at the lazy hack trifecta:
Illogical, truncated alliteration: "Jets plan Plax play."
Pointless rhyming that adds nothing to our understanding of the story: "Yanks weep as Sox sweep." The Yanks did not weep. We all know ths.
And the kicker, a serious story reduced to a goofy but recognizable cliche that...what? How does this help anyone understand anything? "Hog Wild"? That's what you did. You came into work and decided on that. And presumably a series of other editors agreed on this? For your giant newspaper in a huge city? You deserve to go out of business. Everyone does. We're shutting the whole thing down. Not just newspapers. Everything.
Here's a couple more examples it took us five seconds of Googling to find. For more pick up any newspaper or magazine ever printed.
Ok, so here is this. Oh good, a phrase I recognize. I guess I'm obligated to read the story now.
Hehe. I see what you did here.
Ok, so this is...Uh? That sounds like a word I know. I guess...it's supposed to be...negative, right? Is it negative? No one likes skunks. Fuck it, just to be safe I better pick it up and find out what's going on with these skunks.
You can't argue with logic like that. Not when it rhymes. Rhymes are like logic steroids.
[Snickers] That's not how you spell that word silly!
[head explodes]
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15 comments:
kid is operating at a level we've never seen before. threepeat of funny posts over here.
remember that bird out of the project runway in that pussy whipped picture? crazy as Old Deuce, but so cute.
she was a whiny bitch though.
yeah she was.
Guess we've about covered everything huh? Shit.
no action this weekend at all?
Oh, now I get it. Holy Shiite. Heh, that's pretty funny.
I've been trying to throw leaving a voicemail on the list, but can't quite capture how stupid it is in words. maybe i need to walk around in the world for five seconds and get slapped in the face by the boring to fill up the old anger gas tank?
Or maybe, not leaving a voicemail goes on the list. Nothing like a volley of missed calls over the course of four hours, just to find out Paula's wearing the red shirt tomorrow, so I should wear the green.
a voicemail that is 7 seconds of voice and 10 minutes of pants rustling
haha. hate those.
Justin, that's what texts are for. straight and to the point. BANG. message received.
I date a girl from Attleboro. You think they have texting? They're going wild about Calecovision down there.
hehe. Attleboro. Oh boy.
Attleboro...on the list!
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