A little challenge for all of you out in list-land. Tonight at 11pm, I want you to flip over to channel (whatever) and watch the 11 o'clock news. When you come back, you can read the rest of the post.

That shit is for real. Those were the things that they were actually reporting and talking about. I know. But! It gets better! Millions of people from all over the place actually watch it. All the fucking time. Even worse, sometimes they talk about it to me, directly to my face while I'm standing in line for grill day in the cafeteria. Hopefully the next time it happens, they'll be using a charcoal grill and I'll go out Brad Delp style before I hear the stunning conclusion to that car chase involving a teenager in Woburn.

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